Jun 25, 2008

Can we help foster youth?

Guest Opinion

By Carrie Du Bois

As a member of the San Carlos School District board of trustees, I experienced a frustrating board meeting on Thursday. I requested an agenda item and presented it to my colleagues. I admit it was something "out of the box" and not the typical board member request. I asked the board to consider a possible district philanthropy focus centering on the foster youth crisis. I've been thinking about this idea for a few years. I thought about how, as a school district, we could have a big impact on a major social problem.

Foster care always has been an interest of mine. A few recent events motivated me to take action.

My cousin, who lives in Sacramento, signed up to be an emergency foster mother for newborns. For several years, a long list of babies went in and out of her home. Only two of the babies were reunited with their parents. The others went on to another foster home after a couple of months. Two years ago, I had a family party for my mother, and my cousin brought a foster baby to my home. Her name was Abigail. When she arrived, I was shocked to learn the baby was only a few days old. The baby's mother was a methamphetamine addict, and it was her fourth child. The mother took methamphetamine the day before she delivered. My cousin told me that the baby girl arrived at her home 26 hours old and dressed in a boy's outfit. Her umbilical cord fell off while at my house that day.

That night I had trouble falling asleep because the image of that newborn would not leave my mind. What would happen to her? Is she adoptable? The next morning I made several phone calls. The person responsible for the San Mateo County Child Welfare Department told me there were lots of babies like Abigail in our county and throughout the state.

The second event was a visit to one of our elementary schools. I was scheduled to meet with the principal that day, but when I arrived she was a bit frazzled. She had just finished a phone conversation with a social worker who told her that a foster child would move out of the county over the weekend. The principal needed to hastily plan a goodbye celebration for this child, and she was angry she didn't receive more notice. She was worried about the child having to leave the school that had nurtured her over the past several months.

At the California School Boards Association conference in San Diego last year, the outgoing president talked about foster youth in her closing remarks. She said it was the issue that most concerned her and she was troubled by the early emancipation of our foster children. She shared a few heartbreaking examples with the audience of 2,000 school board members.

As a trustee on the school board, I've thought a lot about how educational institutions could possibly do more to bring awareness to the issue of foster youth care. We have a target audience in our parents and the broad community. We could be the force that possibly encourages more support for foster youth. I believed it was possible for districts to have a major impact in one of our greatest social challenges.

At the board meeting on June 19, I took a stab at that. I requested that we make foster care a district philanthropy focus. We could encourage each school to do a project for foster children. Elementary schools could create "Welcome to the World" baskets that could go with the infant to their first foster home. It would include clothing, diapers and other things. What about a district drive to collect gift cards for older foster children? Maybe our governance team could get together and give a group home a makeover. If we did something like this, we would be modeling philanthropy for the children in our district. We could even send literature home about the foster home shortage in our county. The best result of all could be if a few families in our community would take in a foster child or become child advocates.

I presented my idea and then asked for the reaction of my colleagues. There was an awkward silence, and nobody said anything for a few minutes. I could hear myself breathe, and the room was so still. Are they going to say anything? Then one trustee broke the silence. "I don't understand how this fits into my role," he said. Another trustee said he was uncomfortable supporting nonprofit agencies. He said he would gladly help as an individual but didn't think it was good for the group to pursue.

Then there was silence again. I was asked a few more questions, and then the board president spoke. She said quietly, "Let's move on." I wanted to shout out, but I remained quiet. Was that it? Did I blow it with my description?

Should I have written out a better plan? Was our agenda too long that evening? Were they too tired to understand? How could she want to move on without saying anything at all? Would it be different if there were people in the audience? (We only had one community member present.)

When I came home after the meeting, I told my husband the story and how discouraged I was. I threw my idea out and nobody seemed to grab it. My idea quickly fell to the floor without anyone trying to save it. I then remembered what a wise woman said to me once: It is hard work to be an advocate. When you speak out for the disenfranchised, people often want to look away and move on.

The next day, I made some phone calls. I called a member of the county board of supervisors, the executive director of Advocates for Children and the incoming president of our PTA Coordinating Council. All of them grabbed my idea from the floor. There was some hope that my idea would be saved.

During this presidential campaign year, there is so much talk about hope and change. Why do we need to wait for a new president? Why is it so hard to do something for foster children? Change will take place not with the new president in the White House but rather with individuals doing small things and elected bodies paving the way. Why is it so hard for elected officials to think outside the box and try things that have never been done before?

Why can't we work outside our job description for the good of our children? If we really want to leave no child behind, we all must do something about the foster youth crisis. We all must take a step forward to make change happen now.



Carrie Du Bois is the vice president of the San Carlos School District board of trustees She is also the vice president of the San Mateo County School Boards Association and a delegate (Region 5) for the California School Boards Association. She can be reached at cdubois@cbnorcal.com.